TUESDAY FLAT OUT
By Suyi Ayodele
Isabel dos Santos is the first daughter of Angola’s longest serving president, José Eduardo dos Santos, who died on July 8, 2022. The late Angolan president ruled the country for 38 years (1997-2017). Isabel grew up in the presidential palace. She became influential in government circles. That transformed her to become rich, not just rich, but wealthy. At a time, Forbes recorded her as the richest woman in Africa. She leveraged on her father’s presidency to corner good business deals. She sat atop Boards of the nation’s biggest companies from telecommunications to oil, prospecting for precious stones and other thriving enterprises.
But now, the ‘Daddy’s Girl’ is in trouble. Forbes, for instance, has deleted her from the hall of fame of the richest in Africa. Why? Shortly after her father left power, the truth of how she became wealthy started coming to light. All over the world, where Isabel has her assets, there are plans to have them frozen. The reason is simple. The ex-first daughter is said to have acquired her wealth through underhand dealings during the 38 years her father ruled Angola.
This is how Forbes, in a May 27, 2022, article, describes her: “As best as we can trace, every major Angolan investment held by Dos Santos stems either from taking a chunk of a company that wants to do business in the country or from a stroke of the president’s pen that cut her into the action. Her story is a rare window into the same, tragic kleptocratic narrative that grips resource-rich countries around the world.” The summary of Isabel is that of a lady who became wealthy without any antecedent of good business in the enterprise world. Her father, the late president Santos of Angola, was the proverbial squirrel that cracked her financial palm kernel.
At home here, we have more than enough shares of our own Isabel dos Santos. Never in the history of Nigeria have we been assailed by the impunity and affluence of the children of our leaders. That ugly trend started with General Muhammadu Buhari, who, as our husband between 2015 and 2023, could not impose the simple discipline of discretion on her children.
In this current political dispensation, we have had an Olusegun Obasanjo as our president. The most noticeable of his children, while he presided over our affairs (1999-2003), happened to be his first daughter, Iyabo. While one may find it difficult to defend the claim that Obasanjo was instrumental to Iyabo becoming a commissioner in Ogun State and later a senator, we cannot deny the fact that the woman, on her own, has all the credentials required for those positions. And, on a general note, besides her foray into politics, Iyabo remained lowkey all through her father’s presidency. I cannot recall here, any inanity she engaged in.
The late President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua’s children did not come across as children who were over-indulged when their father was president between May 29, 2007, and May 5, 2010. The best we knew of his children while he was in office is the fact that his daughters, Zainab, Nafisa and Maryam, all married into homes of affluence. His successor, President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan (GEJ), is unarguably the only president in this dispensation with no known indulgence of children. Apart from his wife, Madam Patience, who was loud and frivolous like other First Ladies of this era, GEJ succeeded in reining in her children. Majority of Nigerians don’t even know the names of President Jonathan’s children. They were shielded, and still shielded from public glare. “Clueless”, as they labelled the Otuoke-born politician, Jonathan has demonstrated to us that he has full and adequate control of his children.
In contrast, the one they said is the Mai Gaskiya, and epitome of discipline of our era, General Buhari, is the one who first subjected our sensibilities to serious attack with the way and manner he used the State resources to pamper his children. Hanan, one of Buhari’s daughters, took advantage of her father’s position to fly about in Presidential jets to attend the most frivolous of all functions like flying to Bauchi to go and take photographs of the traditional Durbar and the architectural designs in the city!
The Presidency later explained to us that the president’s daughter needed the Bauchi photographs for her fieldwork in her Master’s programme at one of the universities in the United Kingdom. Bunkum! Needless to say, when Hanan touched down in Bauchi with the Presidential jet and the insignia of the president, Bauchi State Government officials were at the airport to receive her.
If we felt that we have seen it all in Buhari’s case, Nigerians have new tales to tell in the attitudes of the children of our current husband, President Bola Ahmed Tinubu. From the first daughter of the president, Folasade Tinubu-Ojo, to her two brothers, Seyi and Yinka, it has been one indulgence to the other. Seyi, until his father was prevailed upon, was said to be attending the weekly Federal Executive Council (FEC) meeting in the Presidential Villa. While Yinka has been relatively self-effacing, Seyi remains loud and ubiquitous! At one time, he was spotted in the Presidential jet enroute to Kano to go and play polo!
The president’s son was present ‘officially’ when the new Chief Justice of Nigeria was being sworn in. Someone said the big boy was learning the rope, that one day may come when the young shall grow and he will swear in his own CJN. Someone please say Amen!
The most recent of the explorations and exploits was the trip by Seyi and Yinka to Maiduguri, Borno State, last week. They were said to have gone to the flood-ravaged state to commiserate with the victims of the self-inflicted pains caused by the failure of government to do what is right. In the one-minute and 18-second video of the visit in circulation, not less than 20 Borno State Government officials received the duo at the airport. And before you ask if the Office of Sons of the President is part of our government structure, Seyi and Yinka were driven straight to the Government House to see Governor Babagana Umara Zulum; and from there, they were moved to the Palace of the Sheu of Borno, Alhaji Ibn Umar Garba, in a state-visit style. On that trip were a handful of aides, whose duty was to attend to the nation’s First and Second Son!
I tried to rationalise that trip. Someone, however, said that my attention should be on the kindness Seyi Tinubu demonstrated in Maiduguri. The president’s son was said to have donated N500 million to the victims of the Borno flood, in addition to other items. Wao! I think, like it was suggested to me, Seyi deserves our accolades. He is such a generous son of our husband. His mum, (or, step-mum), Mrs. Remi Tinubu, also donated the same amount (N500m) to the flood victims, days before Seyi breezed into Maiduguri. Nigerians are fortunate to have such a generous First Family. We should not ask how Seyi made his money. That will amount to what my people call etanu (malicious envy)!
When you have a father who was once a senator, who once ruled Lagos for eight years, and still appoints who rules the state to date, you cannot but be rich. When the man who sired you transformed from being a kingmaker, National Leader of an opposition-turned-ruling party, and becoming the president of the most populous Black nation, N500 million is nothing. Why? The elders of my place say that when the madman is given a hoe, he makes the heaps in between his two legs.
Nobody begrudges a child who resembles the father (Omo ò lè jo baba ká máa bínú omo). Seyi cannot have a father like Daddy Tinubu, who does not know the tribal marks money has, the Ninalowo (Money is meant to be spent), and be stingy! “What is money? Money is nothing. Premium or Nothing.” Those are lyrics of Flavour the Afro pop star in his Big Baller Single. The aides and officials who were on that trip would also ‘lick’ their fingers; I take a bet on that! My friends, Seyi’s fans, told me that he is a “self-made man”, and I agreed with them. Most children of our politicians are “self-made.”
One of the “self-made” children of our leaders was also in the news last week. His name is Abdulaziz Abubakar Malami, son of the immediate past Minister of Justice and Attorney-General of the Federation (AGF), Abubakar Malami. If the video is real and its content true and correct, Abdulaziz is just 29 years old, but he already has a conglomerate that runs into billions of Naira. The narrator in the video, where Abdulaziz’s wealth is flaunted, said that the young man has in his employ, over 2,000 staff. The narrator added that besides being a lawyer with a law firm located at Sani Abacha Road, Birnin-Kebbi, Kebbi State, there was nothing else about the one described as “the third youngest Nigerian” managing one of the richest conglomerates in Nigeria.
The junior Malami is said to own a secondary school, a university, a clothing line, hotels, a rice mill, supermarket and others. His father, a Senior Advocate of Nigeria (SAN), and former AGF is just 57 years old. Before the senior Malami became a minister under Buhari, he was not known as old money. But the God of transformation smiled on his family. There is nothing God cannot do. Today, his son, who is not 30 years yet, is said to sit atop a conglomerate that employs over 2,000 Nigerians. All we are required to do is to praise the boy’s ‘industry’ and his sense of ‘patriotism’ in establishing companies that have taken away a full 2,000 people off the job market. Some children came to this world with the star of fortune! Juxtapose the aforementioned against this story from the days of my childhood.
We were three little primary two pupils of Local Authority Primary School East (LA East), Ikole Ekiti. The first is a cousin. He will not be reading this because of his present circumstances. The second, my childhood friend, and twin brother, is an officer in our state’s local government service commission. Then, yours sincerely was the leader of the ‘gang’ that day.
Our Eskisi ma, (teacher), had a presence. We knew her as Eye Pelu (Pelu’s mother), that’s what the locals called her. Pelu, her son, was our classmate too. It was harvesting time. The older pupils in the higher classes worked on the school farm and harvested groundnuts. A basket of the groundnuts was kept in our class. We had the mid-day break, called “long break”, and Eskisi ma stepped out of the class. Pelu took the advantage. He went to the basket of groundnuts, took a handful, and beckoned on us to come forward for our ‘shares’. He attached a condition. He took the mother’s cane and announced that anyone who accepted to be flogged by him would partake in the groundnuts.
In my little head, I knew that taking the groundnuts in the first instance without permission was wrong. I was taught that early in life. Besides, I could not reconcile why Pelu should flog me first before giving out the groundnuts; we are of the same age bracket. Then, something also told me that the items belonged to all of us, and Pelu was just an Omo Tisha (the teacher’s son).
I stayed back. My cousin and my friend likewise. The three of us shared the same bench in the class. When Pelu was through with those who volunteered to be flogged, he came to us. He asked why we didn’t get up to collect groundnuts. Trust yours sincerely, I was the spokesman for the ‘rebels’. I answered by saying that the groundnuts were not his’ and he had no right to take them or flog anyone. The devil took over Pelu. He landed the cane on me. Mine was a natural reflex. I leapt on him like a leopard. The two other rebels joined. It was a commotion. Sacrilege! Nobody would dare touch an Omo Tisha those days! A classmate once told me that he nearly fainted the day he saw his teacher answering the call of nature! Teachers, then, were regarded as deities, not mortals. Pelu’s yell attracted those in the adjoining classes.
Eskisi ma and two others rushed in. They saw the ‘abomination’. The fight stopped. The three of us stood up, we knew we were in trouble. One of the Eskisi mas that followed Eye Pelu wanted to descend on us. Eye Pelu restrained her. Our Eskisi ma asked what happened. We explained. She confirmed from one or two other pupils if Pelu indeed took the groundnuts, and she got an affirmative answer.
It was like a flash. The next thing we saw was that Pelu was on the floor. The mother, with her heavy presence on top of him. She was beating, pinching and kicking the son. Then she burst into tears. We were alarmed. Other Eskisi mas and sirs came and took her off the boy. The three of us, musketeers, lost colour. We were shaking like a virgin seeing ‘it’ for the first time. We knew we were finished. If Eskisi ma could handle her son, Pelu, the way she did, there was nothing she would not do to us. We waited with bated breath.
Normalcy was restored. Eskisi ma simply went back to her table without looking in our direction. She ordered everyone back to their desks. The three of us stood where we were. She looked at us and asked us to go back to our seats. We obeyed her. Minutes later, class resumed, and Eskisi ma taught us as if nothing happened. That session ended and we moved to a higher class. Eskisi ma did not change her attitude towards us, she never mentioned that we once beat her son. No other teacher reprimanded us for beating an Omo Tisha (teacher’s child).
The lesson registered in my heart in an indelible manner. I got to know from that cradle incident that it is the responsibility of every parent to teach his or her children ethics, morals and good discipline. Pelu’s mum felt bad that her son would go and touch the groundnuts kept on her watch. She knew it was wrong to use the community’s patrimony to indulge her son! No leader should do that! She felt she had failed; that was why she cried while beating Pelu. Wonderful woman, our Eskisi ma, Eye Pelu! While on this script, I asked my friend about Eye Pelu. He answered that our Eskisi ma is healthy and kicking. I owe her a visit; I intend to make that happen as soon as possible. Such a treasure must be honoured! Do we still have leaders like her around?
Seyi and his other “self-made” siblings are lucky. They did not grow up when we had many teachers like my old Eye Pelu. He did not sit under the tutelage of a no-nonsense Eskisi ma, who had the orientation that State property is different from one’s personal effects. Seyi and his siblings don’t have the picture of their school Eskisi mas or sirs, beating up their children for daring to touch what belonged to the entire school without permission.
He and his other folks did not grow up under a mother, like Eye Pelu, whose philosophy is, ohun tí a fi ńké omo wà lórí àte Òyó (what one uses to over-indulge a child is only gotten in the wares of an Oyo trader). Growing up, they were probably not told to differentiate between government property and assets and family belongings. From the State House in Lagos to Aso Rock Villa in Abuja, the philosophy is, gbogbo ejò ni jíje (all snakes are edible). So, leaping to Kano from Abuja in the presidential jet for a polo game is no big deal. Donating N500 million from an inexhaustible bank account is as easy as A B C!
As for those who think that Seyi and his siblings are like Angola’s Isabel dos Santos and would want to interrogate their wealth and the tax or taxes they pay, I have one piece of advice: Tell your own old man to join politics and conquer the world like Alexander the Great, Napoleon and yes, Bola Tinubu!